I often sum up my job as “talking to strangers about abortion.” While it doesn’t completely capture my role at Oregon Right to Life, it’s a pretty accurate summary of what I do during fair season.
Talking to strangers about abortion — one of the most controversial issues of our modern age — is as interesting as you can imagine. In some cases, those conversations go extraordinarily well. Other times? Not so much.
Productive dialogue about abortion is possible, but it isn’t easy. Abortion is an emotionally charged topic for many people, and it can be challenging to remember what to say. Which apologetics strategy should I use? What was that one statistic? How should I respond? Sometimes, my mind just goes blank.
But no matter what, even when your mind fails to produce an answer, you can have meaningful discussions by following some simple guidelines. Here are my top tips for engaging in productive, life-affirming dialogue with pro-choice friends and family.
- Lead with compassion: You never know where people are coming from, and abortion has deeply hurt many women and families.
- Ask clarifying questions: Don’t assume you know the “why” behind a statement.
- Listen to understand, not just to prepare your comeback answer.
- Build relationships: Changing hearts and minds is a long-term process. One of the best things you can do is be a positive example of what it means to be a pro-life advocate.
- Find common ground, even when you disagree.
- Educate about human development and abortion: Many people are woefully uninformed about human development and abortion. Help them learn!
Talking about abortion can be scary, but practice makes better. Have the conversation. Learn from your mistakes. And most importantly? Keep talking about your pro-life convictions. That’s how we change Oregon’s culture — one person at a time.
Want to learn more about pro-life apologetics? Email me at makyra@ortl.org to get free access to the Equipped for Life Course from the Equal Rights Institute.
